chaikidukaan.com

Tag: personal

  • Sympathy for me…

    How does it feel to open the shower one chilly winter morning, hoping that you will have some warm, if not hot water… and what pours on you is the cold water…

    sounds like a funny situation !!! When that happens to me, which it does at times… i usually scream out loud!!! ЁЯША

    what happens when something of this sort happens to emotions…

    Something similar happened to me sometime back… Its not been a very interesting trip this time in UK… work pressure, being alone, not speaking a single word for the entire day, etc etc keeps me busy…

    and to add to it one of my monday mornings, not today, started with bad rains and winds… and while I was trying to handle the umbrella and myself, there were cars on the road, which shamelessly kept splashing water on me everytime they passed by… for someone looking at me, that would have been a funny situation.. but there was li’il that I could do… if i stand under the only two shades around, the cars would ensure i was wet… and otherwise, the rains and the winds would… pretty neat consipiracy that was ЁЯША

    last week… I was told that when I told about this incident to a friend, I was looking for sympathy for my condition in UK…

    and I was stunned… why would a friend ask for Sympathies?
    … friends don’t need sympathies !!! do they?
    was I looking for sympathy? NO…

    strange…

    That incident made me think about a few other people would have reacted to this situation of mine

    Aro: He would have laughed his ass off…. and he will when i tell him this…
    Deepu : Would give a quick practical advice on how i can manage the next time this happens…
    Subbu : Would listen and not really react to it…
    Bindiya: would just laugh and tell me that I am responsible and that I am an idiot to get out in the rain… to end it would ask if I managed a cup of tea or not when i reached office…
    Tushar : Would have said,” Chal koi na… wapas aaja chai piyenge”.
    Mom : Would have called, emailed to ensure that i was keeping myself warm and packed for atleast 5 days after that day… she did… though she does not know that I was running fever the entire week…

    While I now smile thinking about how some people, I know, would extend their sympathies to this cry baby; I remind myself of being careful of how people look at you… its not a very good feeling when you are looked down upon and made to realise that you are not worth it… and I am going to not like it for a very long time….

    Oh on a footnote, I am thinking of doing a roadtrip between London to Brussels via Paris sometime soon… any ideas or thoughts?

  • Outside myself…

    I am here because someone has decided that i should be here, and I am…

    Why am I crying, as one of my friends always says, or feeling bad about things and people who are not around me?

    Instead why am I not loving and living what I should ?

    There is more to life than I can see, there is something else which I don’t realise, there is something that I am a part of but its a part of me too…

    Too many thoughts flying around in random motion inside my head, but when I move out of my own body and see them from outside, they look in perfect symmetry…

    Reminds me of the times, when as a kid, I used to think what if I have to travel to the end of the space… would i really find it?
    Peace

  • Fill it up… and don’t ask how !!!

    There is a way to talk to people who work with you…

    either you simply blame them for making a point, writing an email, sending a note or speaking something.. and turn them off to whatever you are going to say next..

    or you first put your point across, and understand theirs and then see what needs to be done…

    thankfully, i don’t get as irritated as I used to get if someone does the first one with me… but it still does not piss me off any less…

    and thankfully, of all the 60-70 people who have reported to me at work at some time or the other, none of them complained about me being the first type of a person…

    Who can fill a bloddy form right if they are not given the instructions, and specially when the form is also an older version, which is not to be used anymore? and no one bothers to tell that to you either !!! and what adds to the irritation is the fact, that you had asked about the instructions months ago, and thats when it was treated as the least priority item…

  • I Ain’t Got no Left Feet !!!

    Its amazing what one good song can do to you…

    I have been pretty dull since morning… and winamp just now chose to play “Mauja hi Mauja” from Jab We Met…

    first thing i did was pause it, put the headphones one, increase the volume and PLAY…

    and i could do nothing but dance while sitting in couch… well too lazy to get up you see…

    My eyes closed… and what flashed through my eyes were

    1. The jam sessions at college
    2. Spectramind parties
    3. Hughes get-togethers where we used to dance our asses out on our favorite songs being played over and over again ( the sariska outing where we played Dhol Mix of Summer of 69 over 25 times; the rain dance party when Summer of 69 ruled, followed by Amar Arshi’s Kala Chashma)
    4. Mantas party when we danced almost all night;
    5. IBM’s new year parties;
    6. A couple of outings at Capitol, Ashoka in Delhi

    Not that I am a great dancer, but I don’t dissapoint… not myself neither anyone who gives me company !!!

    I am getting a kick out of thinking about those evenings…

    And while I was writing this post, Winamp decided to play DJ with Hare Raama Hare Krishna from Bhool Bhulaiyya…

    and now in true DJ ishtyle, a twisty song from Hey Baby…

    O Meri Jaan, na le le meri jaan… teri adaa…

    Gustaakhi Maaf Kardi.. Ab to insaaf karde…
    Apna Dil Saaf Karde.. Kehna to Maan le..

    Jaane bhi De.. Jo bhi hua Jaane Bhi de !!!

    Hey… could someone send me a link where I can get the list which is published in the Delhi Times every week, for the last weeks best songs?

  • Almost Lost

    While eating my favorite Doritos and having Litchi Juice in a Pint Glass i write this post…

    I almost lost him yesterday.. and why because of one simple reason.. i was not careful enough..

    I am talking about a small plant with yellow flowers that i got for my room sometime back… the instructions said that i need to ensure that the soil is damp and moist and that it needs water once a week… i read the instructions and was happy to see the yellow flowers everyday in my room…


    now what happens day before yesterday is that i come home and for some reason i had to change the place where i had kept this small plant… and i realised that it was dying… the stems were loose, the flowers dull, and leaves almost giving up…

    i felt so bad about it and added some water quickly to it… maybe because the room is pretty warm the water had evaporated earlier than usual… but for whatever reasons, i was loosing my lovely yellow flower plant…

    i checked it yesterday, and it was better… and today its looks as if its kinda improving… i hope it lives for some more time…

    It forced me to think, as if it needs a trigger, but still, about people… don’t we at times treat people like i treated this plant… they are good, we feel nice that they are there, we look at them feel good, they are around we feel happy… but miss out on that small attention that they need to stay that way… and also wonder when we loose people as to what went wrong…

    I think that staying alone has made me more sensitive towards people that I care for, and at the same time makes me want more from people who I feel should take care of me… No, I am not looking for attention here, not at all… I can manage pretty well on my own… and am doing that too…

    the crux of the post, that i wanted to write about, is that this incident just reminded me to do something, however small it may seem, for things that give me something… and not because i am returning a favor… but because I should…
    And lights are coming up slowly all around… the one above are being put up on Lamp-posts in Horley, where I live…

  • keep walking..

    Happiness…

    is

    Music

    specially when you are walking

    on a road

    which has minimum traffic

    in a weather

    which is cold and wet but its not raining

    and you are hit

    by wind on your face… lets call it cold breeze for pleasure ЁЯЩВ

    and рд░рдлреА рд╕рд╛рд╣рдм sings

    рдЧрдо рдФрд░ рдЦрд╝реБрд╢реА рдореЗ рдлрд░реНрдХ рди рдорд╣рд╕реВрд╕ рд╣реЛ рдЬрд╣рд╛рдБ
    рдореИрдВ dil рдХреЛ рдЙрд╕ рдореБрдХрд╛рдо рдкреЗ рд▓рд╛рддрд╛ рдЪрд▓рд╛ рдЧрдпрд╛

    (Gham aur Khushi Mein Fark Na Mehsoos ho Jahan
    Main Dil ko Us Mukaam Pe Laata Chala Gaya)

    I was smiling throughout my walk today i guess…

    Thanks to

    Manna рдбреЗ who sung… рдЖрдпреЛ рдХрд╣рд╛рдБ рд╕реЗ рдШрдирд╢реНрдпрд╛рдо
    Kishor рджрд╛ who sung… рдПрдХ рд╣рд╕реАрдирд╛ рдереА рдПрдХ рджреАрд╡рд╛рдирд╛ рдерд╛
    and a few other lovely singers who gave me company…

    aaj maza aa gaya… sach !!!

    ello… ek aur mast gaana…

    jihal-e-masti mukun baranjish
    Bahale hijraan bechaara dil hai…

    sunai deti hai jiski dhadkan
    tumhaara dil ya hamara dil hai…

    wo aake pehlu mein aise beithe
    ke shaam rangeeen ho gai hai…

    zara zara si khili tabiyat
    zara si gamgeen ho gai hai…

    aisee evening ke liye clapping !!!!

    God bless

  • Choti?

    One of my friends calls her daughter Choti Mishi… no she is not the younger of the two or three… she is the only kid as of now… but still she is Choti Mishi..

    Cute…

    Maybe the mamma thinks she is the badi Mishi… ЁЯША ЁЯША

    Choti Mishi is a darling.. God bless ЁЯЩВ

  • Junk Food, and a story from Junks…

    Junk food is tastier than the regular food… ever wondered why? well i feel because when you are eating junk, you are not really thinking but only enjoying ЁЯЩВ not that you cannot enjoy while you think… but enjoying is more fun without thinking for sure ЁЯША

    I had a nicey nice pizza today… what fun digging into that lovely vegetarian pizza full of brll peppers, jalapenos, olives, sweet corn, and yes.. the fattening cheese… but then i had it after long walk in the bloody 4 degs of cold…

    i loved that walk… a few things kept coming back, no matter how hard i tried shooing them away… but then i managed to leave them somewhere on the horley town centre bus stand… what a relief…

    talking of Pizzas it reminds me of a brilliant day that i had very long time back.. i guess in 2001.. i remember it because that time i was working in Global Groupware…

    well, what happened was the I had to go to office… well not really.. i just made that story up because i wanted to meet my then girlfriend… and i offered mom dad a ride to RK Puram… my chacha’s place… the plan was I would drop them there… pick up my girlfriend… come home… call some friends over, have a party and then drop her and go to chacha’s place to pick mom dad up…

    everything happened exactly like how we thought… except a blunder…

    we had ordered pizzas for food… i had kept the pizza boxes to be thrown when we were moving out.. and asked her to pick them up… now in rush i forgot all about them… and when i reached chacha’s place i suddenly was reminded of this.. i called her up, and asked where did she threw the boxes… and as luck wanted it.. the Pizza boxes were on the washing machine… bang in front of the door, waiting for mom dad to arrive with me…

    now there was no way i could remove the boxes now.. and i was already on my way home with mom dad.. thinking about how on earth am I going to save myself from being killed !!!

    well.. when we reached home.. i volunteered to open the doors.. took the keys… opened the door… picked up the pizza boxes… and put them behind the safe in my room… what a CLOSE SHAVE it was… i blasted her off for this… and then almost died laughing on what could have happened to me !!! oh boy…

    i can still laugh at that day…

    and today comes to an end…

    May tomorrow bring peace and happiness to all.. Amen…

  • …

    Do you read what you see or what I wrote?

  • Walking with myself…

    Walking is a nice thing to do…

    depending on how you’d like it lets you talk to yourself, sing to yourself, be quiet, be sad or be happy or whatever…

    or you may just walk…

    i did… primarily because i was feeling too restless in my room yesterday… it was very warm and cozy, and probably thats exactly what i did not want at that time… so i picked up my jacket, the phones ( which i will not when i go out for a walk now, probably) and went out..

    walked for about an hour before i came back… and in a much better shape mentally than before.. i could appreciate that warmth in the room better now… and was feeling more at ease as well…

    realised:

    that i can humm one song for about an hour… and when i attempt to change the track, i will get back to the original within 5 minutes…

    that i need a music player with all my favorite oldies.. somehow when i am alone, the new songs don’t strike that chord that the oldies do.. maybe because i can sing along better.. whatever…

    that i could resist the temptation of looking at my cell for a while… the first half i just kept looking at if off and on again… dunno what was i waiting for… but maybe i needed something to break that silence, before i got to terms with it…

    and that walking helps you with acidity too ЁЯЩВ

    i hope i can gather enough courage to change clothes and get out of my room again tonight… its getting real cold these days here… as low as 0 degs which is predicted for today… right now my igoogle says that the temprature is around 8 degs outside…